ATTENTION ALL:
It is I, your glorious revolutionary overlord.
I am writing this to inform you all there will be some strict changes incoming:
First of all: No more life jackets. The water is our god, and she will take whom she pleases.
Second: We shall now live in the water. We must embrace it to improve our kayaking prowess.
Third: Those who disobey me shall have their gills forceably removed and banished to the dry lands.
So sayeth I, Ailbhe, Lord and master of the seas.